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  • Writer's pictureAnne Koch

Behind the scenes - Self-reflection for an authentic you

Imagine getting up in the morning and looking in the mirror. What do you see? Like me, a sleepy face, tousled hair and comfy pajamas? The perfect mother who playfully balances household, children and job? Or a woman in whom ideas and dreams are just bubbling, but don't see the light of day?

The image of ourselves is often shaped by superficialities, by outward appearances or by what others see in us. The view behind the "scenes" to the true I is obscured by what we think we are or have to be.

How well do you actually know yourself? Do you know where you want to go and why? And what are you afraid of?

The first step on the way to a more authentic version of ourselves is to take the mirror in our hands. To explore ourselves intensively in all our personality traits, strengths AND weaknesses. This is the only way to discover the core of our being. Only in this way can we recognize what is important to us, what values we want to live by.

"Authenticity is the medicine of our time" says Kathrin Fox in her article "From Autopilot to Conscious Authenticity" (originally in German „Vom Autopiloten zu bewusster Authentizität“).

When we know ourselves better, our relationships with others gain depth. Because we are genuine.

When we know ourselves better, we feel more secure because nothing can throw us off balance so quickly.

And when we know ourselves better, we make better decisions and are more successful overall. Because we can build on our strengths.

But how do we succeed in looking inward?

Since we set out on the path to ourselves, via sabbatical, purpose and nature coaching and mindfulness practice, we keep looking for new ways to think about ourselves, to connect with ourselves. We've made vision boards, filled up gratitude journals, and practiced qigong and yoga.

But most important to us was the following realization: the journey is the destination. It doesn't matter much which way we self-reflect, which tool we use. We just have to start.

And one more thing: Others can accompany us on the way, they can mirror us, what we are for them, what makes us special and lovable. But we can only realize this ourselves. Only in this way can we live up to our full potential. Only in this way can we live an authentic life.


"Being yourself in a world that constantly wants you to be different is the greatest achievement." Ralph Waldo Emerson


How can you get to know yourself a little better each day?

  • Take a few minutes each evening and reflect on your day. What am I grateful for? What have I achieved? What can I do better tomorrow? Write down your answers in a journal.

  • Look at your notes every few months, try to see patterns. Make a list e.g. with the things that are important to you, with your values. Use this list when you make decisions.

Twin tip for readers with children: Also ask your children every evening what they are grateful for and also if something is bothering them. In this way, they learn early on to reflect on themselves and to recognize what is important to them.

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